Family meetings in our single parent household
Single mom life (with one child) means that some things look slightly different for us than for bigger families. Some things are lovely, like having fewer people deciding which movie to watch or when we spontaneously decide to go on adventures. Eating out is a lot cheaper. Sometimes though, having a smaller family manifests itself into laziness. We don't always eat dinner at the table, because it seems like a lot of effort and a little boring for only two people. One thing that I have recently made a priority of is family meetings.
Like at your job, sometimes you need a formal check-up to see how things are going. Does anyone have any complaints? What direction are we going? What kind of goals do we have going into this next season? These things are even more important for family life, and that shouldn't change just because there are "only" two of us. Because of this, I've started scheduling family meetings for Cash and me on the last day of the month. "Scheduling" is a bit grand because I don't have to do much except say, "Hey, we're having a meeting tonight." And he says, "Cool," and has to pause his video game (8-year-olds aren't known for their active social lives), but the point is, I make it a priority.
What do we talk about?
One big thing we do is set down our next month's resolution. We made a different resolution every month in 2018. We usually narrow down what the next one will be in the final week of the month, but the family meeting is where we make it official.
Last month, I also implemented a chore/allowance system. This month, we did a check-up on that. He only earned his allowance one week out of four, so I got some feedback from him on what is not working, and we are adjusting our system.
I also like to ask him if he has any concerns/complaints/comments on what is happening in our home. Please note that I do not run my house like my son and I are equal partners. I make any final decisions and offer direction and correction where needed. However, he does have a voice. I have always encouraged him to speak up (and boy, does he!), and an essential part of that is to make sure I listen closely and take him seriously. I try very hard to make sure he feels respected and as his voice matters, and I think this is an excellent practice for making sure that everyone in the family feels heard.
That's about it for us! Getting started is super simple, and it does not have to be any big fancy deal. I can see us adding other things, like setting goals, dreaming together, and planning family vacations. We do a lot of our talking and dreaming daily, so we don't have a lot that gets built up. If you have a bigger family, you can probably add a lot more fun stuff immediately! You could play a game or spend time catching up on what is happening in each other's lives and bragging about each other's accomplishments. You can make them weekly, monthly, or even quarterly; though I think at least monthly is best to establish a routine. It is important to start the tradition, create space for it, and let it grow to fit your family!